Being an artist is just romanticising your own suffering in aesthetically pleasing ways.

the last boy i called my friend.
Monique Mackay Monique Mackay

the last boy i called my friend.

For the first time in my life, i don’t have a boy for a friend. The girl i once was is gone. The years 15-23 feel like a fever dream, a book i read long ago. My circle now is six women: fierce, tender, unflinching. They have lifted me, softened me, sharpened me, and shown me the power of women’s friendships. This is a story of outgrowing boy friendships, grieving endings, and finding strength in female connection, spirituality, and self-love.

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You Taste Good.
Monique Mackay Monique Mackay

You Taste Good.

You Taste Good is a piece about sweetness turning sour; about love, friendship, and the way taste evolves with time. It explores how we outgrow people and moments, how what once felt safe can shift into something bitter, and why trusting our taste, our instinct, our palate for beauty and truth — is survival. It’s poetry, this is a confession, it’s female rage wrapped in velvet words. For anyone who’s ever had to spit something out before it poisoned them, this one’s for you.

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You’re not ready.
Monique Mackay Monique Mackay

You’re not ready.

You’re not ready…

For the softness that bikes back. For the divine feminine in her rawest bloom — unfiltered, unashamed.

This is sensual self-love. This is a sacred cleansing of all the bad and the ugly. Goodbye and good riddance, your loss sweetheart…not mine. This is me, and no one can ever take that away.

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Making ‘little me’ proud.
Monique Mackay Monique Mackay

Making ‘little me’ proud.

I used to dress for the gaze. Now i dress for the girl who glittered her living room like it was a stage. This one’s for her — the little me who knew exactly who she was, before the world told her otherwise.

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In My Head
Monique Mackay Monique Mackay

In My Head

It’s late. I’m half asleep, half mad, and writing this down because i can’t stop thinking about the shit my girls are going through. If you’re in your head overthinking, over-explaining, over-loving someone who keeps dropping you — this is your sign to stop.

You are not hard to love. They’re just not equipped. Let them go. Come back to you.

And then remind yourself:You are the main character, you don’t chase…YOU choose.

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A seasonal reflection.
Monique Mackay Monique Mackay

A seasonal reflection.

As another year turns, i find myself coming back to the home i’ve built ~ and the version of me it continues to hold. This is a seasonal reflection of softness, solitude, and the quiet power of creating a life that feels good to live in.

This is for anyone who’s ever felt the weight of the outside world and wanted to build something gentler inside. Home is more than a place ~ its not perfect, but it’s mine. And it holds me beautifully.

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The Delicious Mistakes were mine.
Monique Mackay Monique Mackay

The Delicious Mistakes were mine.

I used to carry them like shame tucked into the corners of my heart, too embarrassed to speak them aloud. I played the blame game, ran from my choices, and tried to write the past in prettier ink. But somewhere along the way, i stopped flinching at the memories. I stopped wishing i could undo her. Because she, the girl who loved too wildly, trusted too easily, stayed too long — she was doing her best with what she knew.

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A letter to you, and to myself.
Monique Mackay Monique Mackay

A letter to you, and to myself.

This first post is a beginning ~tender, true, and quietly brave. These words are stitched from heartache and hope, softness and strength. An intimate unfolding. A quiet reclamation. May you find pieces of your own heart tucked between the lines, and remember: we are allowed to begin again, as many times as it takes.

Always, in the glow of Honey and Moonlight

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